As I was reading my daily devotional from "The Power of a Praying Wife" by Stormie Omartian, I came across a few verses in today's devotional that really hit home. Today's prayer and devotional was praying for your husband and his trials. We all go through trials; that's no secret. There is not a single one of us who has a problem-free life. What sets us apart, is how we deal with those trials when they come our way and what our attitude is towards them and those that surround us. To some, it seems crazy to be thankful for your trials; however, as Christians, if we come to God in thankfulness and praise he will bring good things to us. These trials can be a learning experience and a means to make us turn back to God. I bookmarked in my Bible the verse that shows us this....James 1:2-3- "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. (ESV)" Steadfastness.....or patience. There's the old joke out there that you should never pray for patience because you may not like the way God chooses to help you practice that patience. God doesn't just give us patience on a silver platter. No, patience has to be practiced and learned. Trials are the way to learn said patience and put it into practice. It's a way to make us turn to God and seek him. Think about it: when we go through tragedies, what's the first thing most people do? They pray. Why? Because they hope God is listening and will intervene on their behalf. It never occurs to some that they can be taught something from their experiences. God always listens. He just doesn't always answer in the way we think he should. We seem to think our way is the best way. I've been guilty of this on more than one occasion. Omartian said something in today's reading that really made me think: "...if we never suffered anything, what kind of shallow, compassionless, impatient people would we be? But prayer can help us maintain a positive outlook of gratitude, hope, patience, and peace in the midst of it..." It also makes me think of a scene in one of my favorite movies, "A Walk to Remember," where Landon is telling Jamie that he has no faith because of all the bad things that happen in the world. She then replies that without suffering, there'd be no compassion. His reply: "Yeah, well tell that to those who suffer." He didn't know at the time that she was suffering from Leukemia. See, that's the viewpoint some take. Bad things happen to good and bad people alike. The reverse is true, too. Another verse I love: Romans 8:28- "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose (ESV)." I do not believe we stay in a constant state of suffering. Another good, old saying: "If God brings you to it, He'll bring you through it."
I've had many trials in my short 30 years on this earth. The one that glaringly sticks out to me as one of the hardest times in my life happened just 2 years ago. Wanting to be a mother all my life, I was overjoyed to find out I was pregnant. Even more so, when I found out I was pregnant with twins. My joy was short lived as I miscarried at 10 weeks. In these past 2 years it's been a struggle for me to get pregnant. I've been frustrated with my husband and frustrated with myself. I had a difficult time, at first, trying to understand what I did wrong to have what I've always wanted ripped away from me. It took me a while to realize that I hadn't done anything wrong. I wasn't being punished. It's life, and stuff like that happens....even to good people. It made me very reflective. I really think it was then that I started seeking the Lord in a more intentional manner. I struggled in my marriage that first year or so after the miscarriage. I just couldn't understand why we couldn't get back on the same page and conceive again! Over time, I began to see some things I could learn from my experience. Compassion was definitely something I learned. I had another friend who was going through the same thing at about the same time. I've had friends seek children through adoption, only to have it fall through time and time again. I've seen other women I know struggle with trying to conceive, even after being told that it would never happen. I even had a dear friend give birth to a baby that only survived 19 hours. Knowing that these "good" people were hurting like I was hurting taught me something. It's this thing called life, and it happens to everyone. Since then, I've been shown the glory of God in the way he's worked in the lives of these women I know. He's blessed a few through adoption, and he's blessed some with biological children who were told "no" by doctors several times. See, God does work for good for those that love him and seek him.
I also had to let go of some bitterness that I had when those who I thought were "undeserving" of children became parents before me. Who am I to judge when someone has a right to become a parent? I'm not proud of those moments. However, they're part of my growing process. What's happened since this experience? Well, I've been actively reading the Word daily and reading devotional content on blogs and books. I've been focusing on making my marriage stronger. One of my good friends, who just happens to be a new mom, said that you really need a strong marriage to have kids. My husband and I have been working on becoming stronger as a couple, so that when we are blessed with children (notice I said "when", not "if") we can face the challenges of parenting together as a team. We spend a lot of time together doing "life." We enjoy taking painting classes together and displaying our work around our home. We've done a lot of traveling. It was after this experience that we decided that until we have children, we will allow ourselves one extravagant vacation each year. A few weeks ago, a friend at school stopped on her way out for lunch and prayed with me and another friend. I asked her to pray over my marriage, that my husband and I might be on the same page and the Lord will bless us with a child. Since that day, something changed in my marriage. I truly feel that our prayer was answered.
It's with all this that I leave you with two more verses:
Romans 12:12- "Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer (ESV)."
Romans 5: 3-4- "Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope (ESV)."
Ok, so I found 2 more verses having to do with how we should pray....
Mark 11:24- "Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours (ESV)."
James 1:6-8- "But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways (ESV)."
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